Amy Collette

I like to talk about “getting out of my mind” enough to hear the whispers of intuition, the voice of Spirit. Some kind of practice like meditation or a walk in the woods usually does it for me.

But I never thought of mind and spirit being connected to the two hemispheres of my brain until I heard this amazing talk by Jill Bolte-Taylor.

Dr. Bolte-Taylor is a brain scientist who explains, step by step, what happened during a massive stroke she had in 1996. She describes the two sides of our brain as having “two very different personalities.” The right hemisphere sees life “as an energy being” and “connected to each other as one human family. We are perfect, we are whole, and we are beautiful.”

Our left hemisphere, she says, “is a very different place. It thinks linearly and methodically.” It says, “I am a solid individual, separate from the energy flow around me and separate from you.”

Through the experience of her stroke, she felt each side taking over her body and mind in turn.

What she glimpsed in those times when the right hemisphere took over was “Nirvana.” She says, “I pictured a world filled with beautiful, peaceful, compassionate people… who could purposely choose to step to the right of their left hemispheres and find this peace.”

Although it took her eight years to recover, she calls her experience a “stroke of insight.”

She wraps up her talk by wondering which side of ourselves we would choose to live in.

I think that our challenge is to choose both – that’s what it means to be whole. Most of the time we live on the left side – we’re rewarded for being smart and doing great things. But what do we get for growing spiritually? For choosing the flow and oneness of the right brain?

Dr. Bolte-Taylor describes it beautifully. When we’re in our right-brain, “…we are brothers and sisters on this planet, here to make the world a better place.”

Do you dread the family get togethers? Wish you hadn’t planned that outing with your mom or lunch with your sister?

Me, too. I want to relax and have a good time, but then the old tapes start playing in my head…

Usually I get my guard up a few days beforehand. I start to rehearse scenarios in my head about what I will tolerate and what will make me walk out. By the time time we’re supposed to meet, my stomach’s in a twist and my palms are sweating – I’m in “fight or flight” mode. Not exactly a good way to start a good visit.

Before my mom’s birthday this year, I felt my chest getting tight with anxiety. I wanted to see her, but I was remembering past birthdays that ended with accusations, public scenes, and me walking out not long after I got there. Why would this time be any different?

As I felt my blood pressure rise, somehow I was reminded to stop and breathe. And – I was given a sense of healing.

So, I decided to expect healing this time. I didn’t know how it was going to happen, I just knew to look for it.

That choice helped me change my focus from myself to the birthday girl, where it belonged.

I went shopping and put together my favorite kind of gift – a basket full of chocolate, soap, lotion, that kind of stuff. I had fun and got to shift my energy to celebrating another year with my mom.

We met for lunch the next day and had a great time. It felt so different to arrive with a feeling of lightness rather than feeling like a warrior prepared for battle. Taking the armor off wasn’t that hard. I’m writing about it to remind myself that I can manifest happiness and peace in my life.

Healing practices to try

Before you try any kind of healing practice, take a moment to fill up your own tank first.

In your relationships:

• Focus on the love you have for that person rather than on protecting yourself.
• Imagine what your relationship would feel like if it were healed.
• Find compassion for what otherwise bugs you. How can you love that aspect rather than having it drive you crazy?

Expect the best at work with:

• Difficult coworkers – You know, the ones you’d rather run away from? Give a compliment to that person you struggle with. Make it genuine, but really try to find something positive about that person to comment on. (Even if it hurts!)
• Meetings – is there a way you can bring a little humor to a boring or contentious meeting? Try greeting everyone in the meeting and “checking in” first with how their day is going.
• Projects – It’s easy to get stuck doing the same things the same way. Try brainstorming – write down even silly ideas just to get it all out of your head and onto a paper or white board. Then use mind mapping to see relationships where you didn’t before.

Circles of Light – we meet in small groups in person or over the phone to  heal ourselves and each other. In total safety and without judgment, we  each  bring our hurts, our hopes, our intentions and our healing power to share. A Circle of Light is a space for us to find community and grace.

A circle can have a common intention, such as prayer or healing for a person or a family. We can also bring different intentions:

• Career
• Money
• Relationships
• Decisions
• Life purpose
• Healing

We can come with no intention at all, and just ask “What do I need right now?”

To learn more and to schedule a circle, contact me: amy at amycollette.com

A couple weeks ago my friend Joan told me that she’d had the perfect day. I had in mind what a perfect day looked like for me. And I’ve had a lot of the elements of my perfect day, just not all in the same day.

But then I thought – a perfect day could look a lot of different ways. So – I started looking.

The gift is that I’ve started seeing what makes me happy – and making some of those things happen more often. Some of the elements of a perfect day for me:

• Waking up with the love of my life – this happens every day!
• Being with friends – a quick coffee, a hug, even a phone call
• Connecting with myself – through meditation, reading, writing
• Nature – a walk by the creek, a visit with a dog, seeing a hawk
• Moving my body – walking, biking, or my favorite – dance
• Healthy food – another way to be good to myself
• Good work – serving others and the world, however that work looks today
• Great sleep – my bedroom is a sacred space, safe and comforting

I invite you to make a list of what might make up your perfect day. Instead of waiting for them all to happen on the same day – practice looking for those elements today.

I woke up this morning worrying – I think I was worrying in my dreams. Waking up like this used to be a common occurrence, but I thought I had my worrying tendencies under control. I guess the worry snuck in when I wasn’t paying attention…

I read a wonderful book about how to worry less. It’s called “Feel the Fear . . . and Do It Anyway” by Susan J. Jeffers. I’m not talking about the real fear you feel in a dangerous situation. I mean the fears that live in your mind – spinning around until they become a part of your everyday life – diminishing your joy bit by bit.

Jeffers guides you through some simple processes to get to the other side of crazy. And – they work! One of her techniques is to deeply feel the worst-case outcome of your worst fear. It might be awful – really horrible. And – you find out that you don’t die. That you probably could live through your worst fear if it did come to pass – which it most likely won’t.

That alone is amazing. The energy you used to spend on this constant worry can now be turned to something else. And just like with any habit, it’s a good idea to replace it with something else, or you might just slip back into it. But I wanted to take it further, to turn that depleted energy of worry into a machine for happiness.

Meditation is my method, so I chose to turn the scary scenarios of my worry into a platform for transformation. My biggest worry was that my husband would die. At times I was convinced of it happening, and felt my own grief at the news. It did make me feel kind of crazy sometimes. If that energy was having that effect on me, what was it doing to him? I know as a kid the drain that my mother’s worry was on me. I felt responsible for her obsessive focus on imminent danger and death. It surrounded me with fear.

So, in meditation I began to picture a time when my husband was happy, when he was filled with what makes him whole. And I focused on seeing him that way and how it felt. I breathed out love toward him, surrounding him with light and lifting him up in joy. This practice makes me so happy that I easily slip into seeing myself in the same light and love.

The more I practice, the less I worry. And the energy of fear dissipates and becomes peace.

Please enjoy this meditation as a first step to transforming worry to peace:

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(Another dispatch from vacation last week…)

“Go placidly amid the noise and hast and remember what peace there may be in silence.”
- From “Desiderata” by Max Ehrmann

Today I was blessed with the amazing opportunity to kayak in the ocean. Having only recently overcome my extreme fear of water, this alone was a big deal for me. But the real grace was leaving the noise of the bay to float around a mangrove thicket full of birds. I could hear the surf behind me, and only the noise of the animals in the mangroves and the slap of the water on my kayak. A silent, floating meditation.

(Written on paper last week as I was “unwired” at the beach…)

In a sea kayak for the first time, and the dolphins were all around us! Joan was whooping with joy, and even David, who is usually reserved, was grinning from ear to ear and talking to the dolphins. I didn’t really get it until a dolphin swam right next to boat – so close I could touch it! Then I was whooping, too – I have no idea what was coming out of my mouth, but I was so excited I got a little short of breath, I feltso overwhelmed. Never did I expect myself to react that way – I’m usually quiet and calm around animals, but the dolphins’ energy was unlike anything I have ever encountered. They emanate a high vibration of joy. What can you do but join in?

As we paddled around, my friends insisted they were playing with us, but I wasn’t convinced at first.  But after a while, I realized that they were weaving between our three kayaks, sometimes surfing on our bows when we were moving fast. They were having fun with us having fun.

Thanksgiving gives us a whole day to focus just on gratitude. For me, gratitude is where it all starts – balance, peace, freedom, joy, and most of all, love.

I invite you to start this Thanksgiving to thank the people in your life for their love and companionship. To give thanks for the food you eat and the place you live. For beauty in all its forms. For the pets that love you. For the good times and the tough times and the lessons you’ve learned. With gratitude, hug those you love, starting with yourself.

Then… see if you can make a habit of it.

I learned to do this on a twice-daily basis when I most needed it in my life – and when it was most difficult. I felt that I had no control, that things were spiraling downward. I was constantly worried about health issues, finances, work, relationships. So what did I have to celebrate?

That was the challenge, and it might be for you, too.

So start small. I started by focusing on gratitude when I woke up in the morning and when I went to bed at night. When I gave thanks for a roof over my head and love in my life, I realized I had much more to be grateful for than I thought.

Remember, this is fun, a celebration – approach it with a sense of humor. It’s okay to be grateful for a great pair of shoes or that attractive person you met today.

Once you open the door to gratitude, let its beautiful energy surround you and lift you up.