Amy Collette

Three types of courage:

The swift courage of the horse,

The ancient courage of the salmon,

The noble courage of the stag.

~Celtic wisdom

By anticipation, I really mean worry. I was up all night with my heart pounding, rehearsing a difficult conversation. The hard part about that is – I could only have one side of the discussion!

I tried to anticipate (there’s that word again) what the other person would say. Of course none of my worries came true.

Heart pounding still, I confronted a colleague. He was completely unemotional, and listened respectfully to what I said. He even thanked me for the input, as he was unaware of the issues.

So why was I so worried? I realized in the middle of my sleepless night that it had nothing to do with him or our relationship. It has to do with confronting my fear of conflict.

Conflict is not just scary for me- it’s terrifying. I know from childhood experience that bad things can and do happen  – ranging from screaming to hitting to throwing things. Has this ever happened to me outside my family? No. But that fear of danger is so deep, it has kept me quiet- cowering in the corner when any argument breaks out.

So – it’s only natural that situations will continue to arise in my life that force me to face this fear. As I realized this in the dark last night, I felt the gratitude that comes with letting something go.

So does this mean that I’m no longer a conflict coward? Probably not – so I’m on the lookout for the next opportunity to confront it bravely. In the meantime, I need a nap… Zzzz

That’s what the Wizard from the Wizard of Oz called himself. And what was his gift? To help the Lion, the Scarecrow and the Tin Man see that all that they needed was already inside them.

The Lion learned that courage isn’t the absence of fear, but the willingness to proceed in spite of it.

The Scarecrow learned that knowledge is more than memorizing data, it’s the ability to think and clarity of mind.

The Tin Man found that his heart was not just the physical organ that pumps blood, but the soul that connects with other souls.

And Dorothy found that home lives in her heart, along with all the people that she loves.

At least that’s the way I see it. I have been blessed with many Mystical Consultants, from my parents and siblings to my husband, life coaches, friends, gurus and teachers. My clients sometimes teach me the most.

So now I’m a Mystical Consultant – that wizard behind the scenes to help you clear away the smoke and the cobwebs to look into the mirror and see – the light within.

You know how a bad date does nothing but talk about himself? It’s a turnoff, right? But what he’s trying to do is “sell” you on how great he is, so you’ll go out with him again. So you don’t want to be like that and bore other people with your own greatness, right? In our culture it’s much more accepted to be self-deprecating than to brag.

And then… you need a job. The interview is one place where you really need to sell yourself – and it can feel uncomfortable because you’re not used to it.

After college I worked as a temp while I tried to get a “real” job. It was a tough market, but I was still surprised that I couldn’t land a job. Couldn’t people see how great I was?

My mentor, Deborah, gave me some great advice. She had set me up for an interview with a business woman known for her bluntness. Deborah told me to come on very strong. Be bold. Get creative with my answers and just go all out. I did and I got the job. In retrospect I could see that I had been much too timid and held back during interviews.

Like a good date, you can let your personality tell your story. It unfolds naturally in conversation when you are being yourself. A job interview is like dating, but compressed into only one or two encounters. The company is checking you out not just for experience and skills, but for how you’ll fit into corporate culture and how you work with people. You’re also checking out the company and their values to see if you want to make a commitment. Be bold enough to be honest about what you can offer and what you want from this relationship.

When you find the courage to really let your light shine, other people can actually see it!